Challenge #22

Good morning and happy Monday everyone!
How did your weekend of flirting go? I trust everyone had a fun time ;-)

We're going to start this week off right - well technically, we did yesterday, but I mean the work week!
This morning I got to thinking about inappropriate friendships and I thought to myself that we could not be the only married couple who has encoutered this issue - surely every husband and wife has at some point in their marriage. After all, we all started off as single individuals before we decided to couple up. And invariably, there were those friendships/relationships that held on past their expiration date! I'm laughing to myself as I write this because I'm saying this in the most tactful way that I know how.

I believe the majority of husbands and wives have had or maybe still have relationships with members of both sexes that may be to the great disdain of their spouse. Whether it's that co-worker that's overly friendly, that classmate that secretly had a crush on you (or vice versa), or the childhood friend that your spouse just simply does not feel comfortable with - I strongly urge you to re-evaluate your "friendship."

Now let's be clear: am I saying that men and women can't be friends with members of the opposite sex when they are married? No. What I am saying is that any friendship of this kind must be in accord with God's will and in absolute respect of your spouse. What does that mean? 1 Thessalonians 5:22 tells us that we should "Abstain from all appearance of evil." So if it looks bad for you to be going out to lunch alone with your single co-worker, you probably want to steer clear of that. If it looks bad for your single friend who had a crush on you in high school to be texting you, you probably want to steer clear of that too!

What else does it mean? It also means be careful of the company you keep! There are many scriptures and sayings about friendship, but the idea I wish to convey is simply stated in "birds of a feather flock together." Do you have single friends who are only interested in seeking the next thrill, regardless of how it may negatively affect or even hurt others and even themselves? Yes, I mean that friend that wants to hang out at the club or bar, drink, do drugs, sleep around, etc. because to them that is a "good time." Married ladies and gentlemen, think of how this type of behavior will affect your spouse. Maybe it is even that married friend who still acts like he or she is single, knowing that they have a husband or wife at home! Are you hanging around with them to be a witness to them? If that's what you tell yourself, ask yourself if you have to actually hang out with them to be a witness to them and when you do hang out, are you even witnessing to them?? Do you condone what they do? Remember that silence is often viewed as agreement.

Today's challenge is four-fold. First, re-evaluate your friendships. Do you have relationships that God does not approve of? Do you have friendships that your spouse is not comfortable with? Second, if you do, create strong boundaries for these friendships - boundaries that are in honor of God and in respect of your spouse. A true friend will respect your spouse and your decision! If these boundaries cannot be put in place for whatever reason or if these boundaries are broken, eliminate the "friendship" altogether. Third, apologize to your spouse. For either not seeing or disregarding how this/these particular friendship(s) have been hurtful or disrespectful to them. Ask their forgiveness and accept it gratefully. And fourth, repent of this. Ask God to show you any other ways or areas of your life that have driven a wedge between you and your spouse or between Him and yourself.