Challenge #57

"We never grow closer to God when we just live life; it takes deliberate pursuit and attentiveness."
I love this quote from "Crazy Love" by Francis Chan. Immediately when I read it, I thought to myself, if this is true about God who is perfect and loves us unconditionally, how much more so is it true about our spouse who is imperfect and growing in love? If we are to acheive oneness, it is only by the constant growing closer to our spouse. Wouldn't it be nice if once we said "I Do" we instantly became one? In theory, that would be great! But I think we all know that becoming one is a process and a goal that must constantly be worked towards. It is much easier to drift towards isolation, we are naturally inclined to be self-centered and selfish. But as we work towards denying ourselves and putting our spouse first, we see our marriage thrive. So the question and the challenge is: how can you deliberately pursue your spouse today? What can you do to avoid the natural drift towards isolation? How can you row against the current and move closer to your spouse? Think it, do it.

Challenge #56

It is so very easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of life. Many of us spend our days fullfilling obligations and commitments and my hope is that we can all put our spouse at the top of that list :-)

For today's challenge, do something to make your spouse feel special. Big or small, in word or gesture, let them know that they are special to you in some way today.

Challenge #55

Were you able to come up with something to sacrifice for your spouse yesterday? Whether it be something simple as time or money, or something more complex like a hobby or a relationship, these things matter. We should not only be willing to sacrifice for our spouse, but we should also be finding more ways to do so! Whatever you work for, sacrifice for, put your time, money, and effort into, is what you value. This is what you treasure; this is where your heart is. Shouldn't this be your spouse?

We have to be careful not to put more energy into other relationships above our relationship with our spouse. There is only one relationship that should come before your spouse and that is your relationship with God. All other relationships are secondary to your husband or wife. We also have to be careful not to put more effort into our hobbies or extracurricular activies than we put into our relationship with our spouse.

This may be surprising, but time management is very crucial to a marriage! If you are not dedicating and setting aside time for increasing the intimacy in your relationship with your spouse, you both are in danger of isolation. Today's challenge is to take a few minutes to look over your daily/weekly routine. Identify where the majority of your time is spent. If time with your spouse has not been a priority in your routine, seek and find periods of time in your day in which you can better include your spouse.

Challenge #54

A late in the day post, but significant nonetheless. What can you sacrifice for your spouse today?
Think of something you can give up for them today, even if it is not something physical.

We'll talk more tomorrow!

Challenge #53

How did yesterday's challenge go? I wonder how many times my attitude has been discouraging to my spouse. Probably way more times than I could ever fathom. At times, your tone of voice or even something as simple as your lack of enthusiasm can be a source of discouragement to your spouse. We must realize that our spouse often looks to us as a source of encouragement, as the push they need to get through hard days or difficult situations. Let's be that and more!

It's Wednesday, "hump day," as it is so affectionately called. What will your spouse be doing tonight? I know what mine will be doing: rounding up our four children and taking them to church. I am so very thankful to have a spouse who is willing to do this because I have other matters to attend to. Do you have a spouse that goes out of his or her way for you? Does your spouse pick up the slack when you're unable to help? If so, praise God! But if not, try being the kind of spouse that you would like to have.

I'm sure you've heard this expression "kill them with kindness." That is our challenge for today. "Kill" your spouse with kindness. Overload them with love and compassion, so much so that they don't know what to do with it all!

Challenge #52

Have you noticed that it brings happiness to your spouse when you do things for them? It's hard not to love someone who goes out of their way for you, someone who does what is best for you. I encourage you all to keep your spouse's best interest at heart.

So on to today's challenge!

Have you ever heard someone say "it's not what you said, it's how you said it?" Sometimes it is better to say nothing at all than to say something, even good things, the "wrong" way. More times than I can count, I have both said and heard words that in themselves were not wrong, but when taken in the context of the speaker - tone of voice, gestures, body language, facial expressions, etc. - were very damaging. Today focus not only on your words but how you say them. Let your context, especially your tone, reflect one of kindness and consideration as you speak with your spouse today.

Remember Ephesians 4:29? We read it earlier...
Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers

Have You Heard?

We are giving away FREE registration to Weekend to Remember for the month of March!

Click here for details: The Contest

Challenge #51

Hope you all had a wonderful weekend!
You know what I love most about the weekend? Spending more time with my spouse. During the week, we are both very busy and bogged down with obligations. But on the weekend, that's our time. Whether we're running around doing stuff or just relaxing at home, I enjoy being together. Someone once made a negative comment about the amount of time we spend together, saying that they could never spend that much time with anyone. I believe that when you capture the essence of what marriage is really supposed to be - you and your spouse loving and serving one another, growing together in spirit and truth, having more than just the title of "husband" or "wife" but being best friends, closest confidants, on the same team, biggest fans of eachother, etc. - you will want to spend a great deal of time with your spouse! You will miss them when they are away. You will long to be reunited. You will do your best to enjoy the time you have with them, however great or small. They will be your greatest blessing on earth!

I know some of you out there feel this way and there are others who don't feel this way, but want to. There are many things in this world that can prevent you from ever achieving this type of intimacy and oneness with your spouse, but there is one in particular on my mind today and that is this: SELFISHNESS. Yes, you read right. Selfishness. Any time what "I" want comes before what "you" or "we" need. Selfishness. There is something so dangerous about it and I will tell you what it is: subtlety. Selfishness is such a sneaky feeling. It really will creep up on you! You will find yourself thinking and even saying things that are purely selfish without even realizing it. That is why it is so important to die to yourself daily. What does that mean? Deny yourself. Put others before yourself. Think of the needs of others before the wants of yourself.

Today's challenge is to assume the attitude of a servant. For the entire day, let your mindset be this "how can I serve you today?" And whatever comes to mind, do it!

Please don't take this out of context. I'm not saying that you have to be your spouse's slave in any way, shape, or form. What is the difference between a slave and a servant? A slave is forced into bondage and does things unwillingly. That's where most of us keep our mindset: "I have to do this for you even though I don't feel like it or I don't want to." A servant does things out of love, honor, respect, and for the good of the one they are serving. The mindset of a servant is "how can I serve you? How can I help you? How can I love you?" Servants serve and do so willingly. Feel free to check out what the dictionary says it means to serve and see how you can apply this to your spouse today. http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/serve

Weekend Challenge #7

This weekend's challenge comes from a friend and if very similar to challenges we've done in the past. It focuses on negative thoughts in an effort to limit them along with their effects. You can call it "Recognize and Replace." I've editted below:

"Thoughts can be a very damaging thing. They are solely between us and God, but can cause outward behavior that may be damaging. Try and catch yourself and recognize each negative thought, even just the “little ones.” When you recognize it, immediately replace it with a positive thought. For example, you think, "She doesn't understand what I go through." Replace it with "She is faithful to me and she loves me." If you think "He never takes out the trash," replace it with "I am thankful he comes home everyday to me, or I am thankful he has a job."

Recognize and replace!

Challenge #50

Bryan Carter said that "Differences are God's way of sanding off our rough edges." You may say to yourself now 'yes my spouse is definitely abrasive...' lol! But you will be wise to learn that it is actually an awesome blessing to us how different from our spouse most of us are. Where we are weak, they are strong and vice versa. There are so many areas of differences between us in so many ways - we are truly complementary. We are made to fit together and support one another. And when we put our strengths together instead of focusing on each other's weaknesses, we make a wonderful team! It really boggles the mind when you think about it. Frequently remind yourself not to hate the differences, but cherish the differences. Appreciate the differences. Thank God for the differences!

I saw this yesterday and we spoke briefly last night as to how true this simple statement is: "If God had a refrigerator, your picture would be on it. If He had a wallet, your photo would be in it. He sends you flowers every spring and a sunrise every morning... Face it, friend. He is crazy about you!"  ― Max Lucado

The weather is getting great where we are and it is so beautiful outside. So often, we forget that the things we most frequently take for granted are truly gifts from God. Every good thing in our lives is a gift from God! Today's challenge is to enjoy some time outside reflecting on your many gifts from God. Share a sunset with your spouse and talk about how blessed you are to have them as your life-long companion amongst your other many blessings.

The Contest

We have been discussing this for a while now, ironing out all the various details and we figured now's the time. It's the 1st of the Month and what better time is there for us to be having our own little contest?!

So we decided to do some giveaways this month. We're going to be giving away some of our favorite resources during the month of March and we invite you all to participate in our contest for a chance at winning one!

This contest will run all month long with a winner the third and fourth weeks and one grand prize winner on the 5th and final week. The third week winner will receive a copy of "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. The fourth week winner will receive a copy of "Real Marriage" by Mark and Grace Driscoll. And our grand prize winner on week five will receive a free registration to the Weekend to Remember event of your choice!

Okay, those are the prizes and now here are the rules:

1. To enter the contest, you must first like our facebook page.
2. Second, you must follow our blog. If your blog name or title is not immidiately apparent to us, please send us an email letting us know who you are so that we can match your blog name to your facebook votes.
3. And third, (this is where it gets difficult), you must get your friends and family to do likewise!
4. Friends and family may "vote" for you by "liking" BOTH our page and your post (see below)
5. In order to qualify for first prize, you must receive a minimum of 50 votes. In order to qualify for second prize, you must receive a minimum of 75 votes. And lastly, in order to qualify for our Grand Prize, you must receive a minimum of 150 votes. Winners of either of the books ARE still ELIGIBLE to win the Grand Prize!!!

How will we keep track of this you say?
On our facebook page, post your names and wedding dates. For example: Husband & Wife April 15, 2004. Any friends or family supporting you must like BOTH our page AND your post so we can keep track. And giving away such a prize as a free trip to Weekend to Remember, we will keep track! Your likes must match: your supporters must like both our page and your post for it to count as a vote.

In the event that there is a tie, we will have a tie breaker at a later date.

So here's how you win:
Whoever has the most votes during week 3, on March 17th at 10:00pm Central Time will win "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman.
Whoever has the most votes during week 4, on March 24th at 10:00pm Central Time will win "Real Marriage" by Mark and Grace Driscoll.
Whoever has the most votes during the 5th and final week of our contest on March 31st at 10:00pm Central Time will win free registration to the Weekend to Remember of their choice! Remember, Grand Prize is only redeemable if votes are in excess of 150 or more.

We will announce the winners on our blog and facebook page. Winners must contact us within 24 hours of the announcement at theMChallenge@gmail.com with their pertinent information to claim their prize. Upon contact, we will request any further information needed to furnish your prize.

Please no cheating. Cheaters will be disqualified.
God speed to you all and thank you for participating!

Challenge #49

Our apologies for leaving you all challengeless yesterday. Four of the six of us were ill yesterday and we're still feeling it today. We have that crazy 48 hour bug that seems to be making its way across the nation. How our middle two daughters managed not to catch it with all the rest of us suffering around them is unbeknownst to me! Anyway, enough about stomach turning sickness. How did you all do yesterday? I hope that you all have gotten so into the routine of being selfless and loving towards your spouse that it just came naturally for you to do for them, no challenge needed! :) Just the thought: that would be awesome!

We'll keep it short today.
We've all heard that opposites attract and more than likely you and your spouse are very different. This is because God uses our differences to complement eachother. This exercise was done at The Art of Marriage and for today's challenge, we're going to take it a step further. Identify and share with your spouse some ways that their differences have benefitted you.

Ecclesiastes 4:9
Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour.